Let me tell you some things that have been on my mind......
1. It feels good to wake up out of a 2 year long figurative coma.
2. I really really want Mitt Romney to win.
3. Sometimes lately I get that feeling in my chest like I can't breathe.
4. When things aren't going to great in the relationship department, thats when you step back and take time to work on yourself. And it feels sooo good.
5. I need forgiveness in my life to scrape a black pile of resentment out of the pit of my stomach. Because it's just sitting there making me sick.
6. I love and will always love Ingrid Michaelson and Dashboard Confessional.
7. I pledge to never again be someone that I am not.
Today my friend Katie called. She is a fiesty southern belle of mine that lives far away on the east coast, and we have talked on the phone and kept in touch for years. I have only met Katie twice, but I feel like she's one of my very best friends. The first time we met was when I drove to her little house in Knoxville TN to visit her for a week. Long story, but it was totally worth it. She told me 'Em, you don't deserve to take Sh*t from people that don't appreciate you. If they don't get you, leave 'em in the dust.' um YES.
That was probably the best part of my day. Teaching today was tough. Screaming children. Glue on someone's head. Don't ask. But along with my day job i've been giving an opportunity.
My friend works at Anthropologie as the general manager, and she offored me a job seasonally as a sales associate. I drove up there today in a rush because I had to come home after work and change so that I could 'look the part'. Eyelet lace dress with a denim jean jacket, and mid calf boots. It was a pretty good interview outfit if I do say so myself. I got stuck in traffic on the way in the mixmaster in Dallas, and I had that feeling like I couldn't breathe again. Until finally I arrived and walked into the store, and I really did feel like all of my worries just dropped to the floor. I felt calm and something about the clothing and home items in that store makes me feel peaceful. They play music that sounds like imogen heap and I heard one of my Ingrid songs play while I was waiting on the couch for my interview.
The girl asked me questions like 'what inspires you' and 'what good things are happening in your life right now'. She also asked me who my icons and idols are, and why I love Anthropologie. And I felt very calm and awake, in an out of body sort of way. I got the feeling like I was at home. And I realized that I need a zen space in my life to focus on the things that inspire me as a person individually. Needless to say I got the job! And what I value more than the Xx% discount is the chance that I have to learn about the fashions and styles that come from Anthropologie; a store that is inspired by world culture and trends. Now that's something that I'm very passionate about.
Before my mission I used to read this book called 'Writing Down the Bones'. A good friend recommended it to me, and it's all about how to put your soul down on paper and express yourself through writing. Onetime while I was living here before my mission I walked down the street to the gazebo on the lake and sat there at dusk. I wrote all of my thoughts and feelings down in one continuous stream onto the paper. One of the artist's suggestions is that you don't have to write from top to bottom on the paper. you can write anyway that you want! in circles, swirls, bottom to top. And going against the grain really lets the things in your heart that are trapped in there without an anchor come out. And lord knows I have a slew of those.
