Its time

I look at the clock and it ticks, ticks, keeping me awake.
keeping time to my life, so fiercely and ruthlessly.
and it seems that there's not enough. of anything.

Time: it slips away. Like someone you can't replace.
Do you mourn? Do you compensate? Do you pretend it didn't go by?
That's the question I ask the clock
as its ticking
stealing away my sleep.

Time is always taking something precious.
The question is, was it worth it? i mull this in my mind
kind of like men that roll a baseball back and forth between their hands
with that far off look in their eyes. and you wish they were looking at you
when they are waiting....for something.
I think of this too while I'm mulling.
1:31am

Swallowed in the sea of my own thoughts......
When you love someone, does it ever go to waste?
I'm asking the clock, hoping it will answer. Since its the only one here.
And so incessant on occupying me. A question I used to be so sure of the answer.
Hopefully the clock will know. After all, it controls everything.
And even though all I hear is ticking, I know the answer.
And I stop mulling. Stop thinking. Stop hurting.
And I know
Its time.